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View Full Version : How do you fake sick?


I am Jesus Cheist
11-05-2006, 06:30 PM
I REALLY dont wanna go to school tommorow, so is there any way to fake sick. My parents wont buy the "Im sick I have a fever act".

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:30 PM
How do you manage to breathe?

chucktaylors369
11-05-2006, 06:32 PM
Why don't you want to go to school?

drowning_fish
11-05-2006, 06:32 PM
May I ask why? Did you get a zit or something? Because that would be a GAY reason to ditch school for

GottaHaveStyle
11-05-2006, 06:32 PM
i usaully stick a carrot in my ass that way when im laying in bed ill be all in pain and moving around and kinda leaning up, and throw in a couple coughs and yer good.

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:32 PM
Why don't you want to go to school?

He was a party and was getting butt bumped by some grizzly gay man, and people walked in and got pictures.

bradley7
11-05-2006, 06:33 PM
Buy some dip and grab a bunch,swallow it and go stand infront of your parents.They will see you throw up and say you feel bad(wich you will for a while) ahaha.Just an idea...

YourMom
11-05-2006, 06:33 PM
Just stay home you fucking vagina, or leave and hang out with buddies

chucktaylors369
11-05-2006, 06:33 PM
What did you have for supper tonight?

This is a serious question...

if you had say beef stew.... grab the left overs and put them in the toilet and some in your mouth so it looks like you get threw up.

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:34 PM
Take lessons from the book
"bulemia for dummies"

drizzle
11-05-2006, 06:34 PM
eat 2 bananas really quick then drink a sprite as fast as you can, and go in front of your parents as fast as you can.

the potassium will react with the carbonation, and you'll throw up. it'll work...

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:35 PM
What did you have for supper tonight?

This is a serious question...

if you had say beef stew.... grab the left overs and put them in the toilet and some in your mouth so it looks like you get threw up.
Nah that wouldnt work because the acid in your stomach would decay it to much. However you could take some hydrochloric acid and mix it with what you think is in your stomach and let it sit in a pot, wake up at like 4 in the morning and tell them your sick. Or if you have it available, drink a hole bottle of ipakak

amillionkickflips
11-05-2006, 06:36 PM
hahaha i dont have school tomorrow. or the next day. haha

shampoo
11-05-2006, 06:37 PM
Tlel them it burns when you pee and you have strange bumps. They won't want to look, trust me.

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:38 PM
Tlel them it burns when you pee and you have strange bumps. They won't want to look, trust me.

I have those symptoms whats it mean?

shampoo
11-05-2006, 06:38 PM
I have those symptoms whats it mean?

You have the common cold. There's nothing that can be done, I'm sorry.

drowning_fish
11-05-2006, 06:39 PM
I swear, people don't know how to do the simplest things nowadays... Faking sick is easy as shit. I used to do it all the time. My parents still sent me to school saying education is more important than health and that I could always just go to the doctor's after school... I just go to school anyway... What could possibly make you not want to go?

amillionkickflips
11-05-2006, 06:40 PM
if i dont want to school i just go anyway and sleep through all my classes. or i go to first period and then go to the nurse and call home. then my parents feel bad for me cause im at the nurse so they come pick me up.

MaC-
11-05-2006, 06:40 PM
watch farris beuler's(sp?) day off.

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:40 PM
You have the common cold. There's nothing that can be done, I'm sorry.

So if i lick a hookers ass (she has the red bumpies) and a gini comes out what should I do?

chucktaylors369
11-05-2006, 06:41 PM
if i dont want to school i just go anyway and sleep through all my classes. or i go to first period and then go to the nurse and call home. then my parents feel bad for me cause im at the nurse so they come pick me up.

good idea..

ToxicSkater
11-05-2006, 06:41 PM
I have those symptoms whats it mean?
Hahaha:-L

shampoo
11-05-2006, 06:41 PM
So if i lick a hookers ass (she has the red bumpies) and a gini comes out what should I do?

Praise Allah....

Valo Negroth
11-05-2006, 06:42 PM
Get a little bit of food chew it and run to the bathroom and fake throw up. Get a parent and show them, in case they don't belive you.

BLacklabel/\
11-05-2006, 06:43 PM
Stay in the bathroom and act like your taking a squat until they leave and or just put your hand down your throat for a lil vomit, then just stay in the bathrrom lfor like 25 minuets.

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:44 PM
Praise Allah....

Well I wasted my 3 wishes before i could praise allah, but luckily she said shed give me 69 more if i 69'd her. Shes got the body of Jlo and the face of Bill Clinton, im out of brown bags. Should I just use a plastic one?

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:45 PM
I cant believe I didnt think of it before! Just say you got the squirts. Good old diareha excuse never fails me!

BLacklabel/\
11-05-2006, 06:46 PM
I cant believe I didnt think of it before! Just say you got the squirts. Good old diareha excuse never fails me!

So basicly my plan?

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:46 PM
So basicly my plan?

I dont know what your plan was, but mines better.
My ipakak plan would be the most humorous though. Ive always wanted to see someone down a whole bottle of that stuff.

MullenSucks
11-05-2006, 06:46 PM
I cant believe I didnt think of it before! Just say you got the squirts. Good old diareha excuse never fails me!

If everything you post is going to be so stupid, leave the site.

Hairy Johnson
11-05-2006, 06:48 PM
If everything you post is going to be so stupid, leave the site.

If everytime you talk I get a boner, you should post a picture of yourself and see if I blow.

Z3R0_SK8R_182
11-05-2006, 06:54 PM
^ that should make you sick

GottaHaveStyle
11-05-2006, 06:55 PM
no it should make you horny

star_skater
11-05-2006, 07:10 PM
suck it up and go to school..

Adio Skater
11-05-2006, 07:19 PM
/\exactly

or

Since fake throw up is for losers, throw up for real! Go up to mom and dad, stick your finger down your throught, and barf all over them! They should think your not yourself because your forcing your self to throw up!

zachnelson24
11-05-2006, 07:50 PM
i don't have school tomorrow, and i didn't have it last friday. parent teacher conference time rocks, especially because mine don't care.

atmboy136
11-05-2006, 08:31 PM
haha, i just go to school (here its soooo easy to fake sick) and i just go through like 2nd period, then i go to the nurse, say i dont feel good. they dont do ***** they just ask if i feel the need to call home, or to be sent home. sooo simple, and i just say, i wanna go home, and i pretend my tummy hurts. its so easy...

SkatepunK
11-05-2006, 08:32 PM
make yoursleve throw up, that what i do

Cazstyles
11-05-2006, 11:13 PM
Eat lots of food. Then drink as much water as you can, maybe 5-6 glasses and then you will chuck. I call it power chucking, you can do it at school aswell.

Monkey Sk8er
11-06-2006, 11:02 AM
fingers down the throat is gd just do it more than once in the sink and try to cloge it and then put water in it to make it look bad or u could just eat a hamster?

B-B-Baker
11-06-2006, 11:10 AM
i skipped today ...i just told my mom...since we dont have school tommorow im not going today and she was like .. ok

Crispy
11-06-2006, 11:58 AM
If everything you post is going to be so stupid, leave the site.

If every one of your posts are going to be you bitching at people, leave this site.

B-B-Baker
11-06-2006, 12:03 PM
If every one of your posts are going to be you bitching at people, leave this site.
enought said

MaC-
11-06-2006, 12:03 PM
this thread is pointless now, hes probably in school or already went.

DomPy
11-06-2006, 12:04 PM
i skipped today ...i just told my mom...since we dont have school tommorow im not going today and she was like .. ok



wow, how did that work?

B-B-Baker
11-06-2006, 12:06 PM
wow, how did that work?
umm she is cool like that haha
she doesnt care what we do also long was we dont get in trouble or get below c's

MaC-
11-06-2006, 12:07 PM
my parents are the same.

KickFlip65
11-06-2006, 12:09 PM
Well,luckily,due to a previous stomach disorder,i can make myself throw up on demand,obviously without my fingers or anything

but thatss just me =X,wake youre parents up at like 4 in the morning,and be like " i cant stop throwing up "
something along those lines

Rock_em_tight
11-06-2006, 07:55 PM
When I fake sick I eat some food and then vomit so it appears that I feel shitty.

yeahyeahyeah
11-06-2006, 08:01 PM
suck it up and go to school..

exactly.

Schism
11-06-2006, 08:10 PM
1. get a glass full of water
2. wait in bathroom for parent to come to door and ask are you ok
3. say i dont... then start gagging and splash water into toilet
4. flush toilet
5. put a bit of drool around mouth and try to make your eyes red and strained (might come with gagging), Additional - dab a bit of water on shirt, additional try to find smelly subtance to add to water (something that smells like vomit)
6. come out of bathroom looking like you threw up


Should work, always does for me.

yeahyeahyeah
11-06-2006, 08:32 PM
Eat Old Cheese. Simple.

B-B-Baker
11-06-2006, 08:59 PM
Eat Old Cheese. Simple.
hahaha or if you really want to stay home just punch yourself in the balls as had as you can acouple times......

yeahyeahyeah
11-07-2006, 02:12 AM
hahaha or if you really want to stay home just punch yourself in the balls as had as you can acouple times......

Uhhh... If you hit your balls your not going to tell your mom "Mommy my balls and head hurt I want to stay hhooommeee...."

SkaterForLife117
11-07-2006, 06:25 AM
hahaha or if you really want to stay home just punch yourself in the balls as had as you can acouple times......

Yeah but what if you didn't throw up, then you have to go to school and have nuts that feel like they're going to explode.

black_world_skater
11-07-2006, 06:44 AM
Puke all over yourself in front of your parents and be like "I don't feel very well....."

Brian10
11-07-2006, 02:45 PM
pull a self induced vommit, ive never done it just that will work if your desperate enough

Critter_Skater
11-07-2006, 02:47 PM
i dont need to fake, my parents let me stay home.